Kind Feelings by Daniil Kharms

A dear favorite and a big influence of mine is russian surrealist writer Daniil Kharms. Attached here is a little piece called “Kind Feelings”. More stories here

by Daniil Kharms

When I see a human being, I feel like hitting him in the face.
It is so pleasant to hit a person in the face!
I sit at home in my room doing nothing.
Somebody drops in to see me. He knocks on the door. I say, “come in.” He comes in and says, “Hello. How nice that I caught you at home.”
I bang him in the face and then kick him in the crotch. My guest falls down in terrible pain. I kick him in the eye with the heel of my shoe. People
shouldn’t loiter around when nobody asked them to come in.

Or another way. I offer the guest a cup of tea. The guest accepts, sits down at the table, drinks the tea, and talks about something. I act as if I am listening
to him with great interest, nod my head, ooh and aah, raise my eyes in surprise, and laugh. The guest, flattered by the attention I am paying to him, lets himself
go more and more.
I calmly fill his cup with boiling water and splash the water in the guest’s face. The guest jumps up and holds his face. I say to him: “I don’t have any more kind feelings
in my heart. Get out!”
I throw out my guest.


Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in: Logo

You are commenting using your account. Log Out /  Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )


Connecting to %s